The sweetest turndown

It's usually in the dead of night that the most memorable conversations happen. Maybe it's because of alcohol or the grogginess that we tend to be more vulnerable. We cast away our inhibitions and shed a light on our true selves.

I haven't had a conversation this deep in a long time. A talk I had with a guy I fancied left me speechless, retrospective, and introspective. It came as a surprise because I've known him for less than a week. Here is a glimpse of a few things that he said to me:


Like I told you before, you are the type of person that leaves a mark. I really feel comfortable with you. We have a lot of things in common. I like talking with you. We really connect. I dunno. But I believe that we create an aura that attracts other people that are like us.

I also understand why there are people who easily fall in love with you. You are nice and sweet. Your first boyfriend will be so lucky because you'll love him with all your heart.

I also really appreciate your honesty. It's something so rare these days. I like that you are true to yourself. I admire you when you walked out in McDonalds. You are true to your emotions. I'm also like that, I can brutally frank.

So I want to say that I really value you as a person. I really value you as a friend. I'm sorry if ever led you on. But I really value friendships more that relationships. Friendships last. Relationships can end with a single fight. I can back off now if you want. But honestly, I don't. I really want to be friends with you.

You are a really great person. You just need to be comfortable in your own skin and appreciate who you are. That's the problem with people nowadays, they cannot see how great of a person they are."


I admit that I was really sad at the beginning. I couldn't process the fact that we really connect and he's really into me yet not in the way that I expected or even wanted.

Also, I've always belittled myself. I appreciate that he sees the value in me that I don't see. More than anything, this experience is a lesson of self-love. I am learning to love myself more.

I'm glad that he was honest. I'm glad that things have been labeled and defined. I'm really happy to have found a new great friend. =)







_________________________

This whole exercise in honesty reminded me of one of my favorite Relient K songs. =)

I'd better rest my eyes
'Cause I'm growing weary of
This point you've been trying to make
So rather than imply
Why don't you just verbalize
All the things that you're trying to say

Thought this would turn out so well
But I'm beginning to see
That instead it's trouble
Into a pattern we fell
Of prolonging the inevitable

[Chorus:]
Why don't you
Come right out and say it?
Even if the words are probably gonna hurt
I'd rather have the truth
Than something insincere
Why don't you
Come right out and say it (come right out and say it)?
What it is you're thinking
Though I'm thinking it's not what I wanna hear

I better check my pride
Because I was starting to think
I was on to something good
But things started to slide
And I sit here in retrospect
And understanding that I misunderstood
Thought I could make up your mind
And then this decision locks up
So tight it couldn't be touched
Thought you were being so kind
But keeping your mouth sealed shut
Rather than just opening it up

[Chorus]

And I tried
To guess what goes on in your head
'Cause in your mind
I just might find
All those things you left unsaid
And I'll try to maybe not regret anything
Later on after I'm gone
You'll wish that you
Had listened to me (listened to me)

Why don't you
Come right out and say it
Even if the words are gonna hurt
We're better off this way
Why don't you
Come right out and say come right out and say
What I know you're thinking anyway
Why don't you
Come right out and say it
Even if the words are probably gonna hurt
I'd rather have the truth than something insincere
Why don't you
Come right out and say it (come right out and say it)
What it is you're thinking
And just what it is you're thinking